Monday, September 8, 2008

The Iron Filing that Broke the Bloggle's Back

In all of my excitement to share my medicines with my readers, I failed to mention one other tidbit:

Flax Seed Oil: I take two Gel-caps worth of this stuff every day at Trillium's request. They are scary-looking. They are cylindrical, black, and look eversomuch like two dead cockroaches with their legs pulled off. I woke up this morning at 5:30, remembering that I had not included this stuff in my list and tried to remember why I was doing it. I couldn't think of what I had been told. So, in the spirit of entertainment, I began conjuring up the most ridiculous reasons why I should. As it turns out, the most ridiculous of my ideas were true. Flax seed oil is a heart lubricant; it keeps all of the valves operating without excessive "squeaking", "clanking", "clunking", or even the occasional "ping". It softens the tissues of the vascular system. Apparently whenever I move in my sleep, the crunching of my veins wakes Trillium up. She said it was like someone jumping on a very large bag of angel hair pasta. Along with eliminating the breakfast cereal aspect of my cardio-vascular system, flax seed oil also makes the inside of my arteries slick, so that when my chunky, iron-encrusted blood passes by, it does not get hung up, thereby reducing the pressure necessary to shove the little ingots through the tubes.

Now you know all there is to know about what I am going to do in about three minutes. I will pop all of these pills at once with a large slug of "green drink" which is currently under construction even as I type. If I am lucky, Trillum will bring it to me..... BOY AM I LUCKY!!!

4 comments:

shydandelion said...

I like flax seed. It's crunchy. Yum....I figure I can get oil from just eating it. No cockroaches necessary!

Rebecca said...

I take 1 1200 mg Flaxseed Oil supplement every morning. I also take:

Ester-C - according to the label it provides me with a powerful Immune system support.

Ginseng - It's label states that Ginseng may enhance the ability to perform physical and mental work. Ginseng is used to invigorate the mind and body. It also alters the way the body uses carbohydrates and fats for energy.

1000 mcg B-12 - prevents megaloblastic anemia by helping to form red blood cells. It also helps to maintain normal levels of homocysteine which is important for heart and circulatory health.

Osteo Bi-Flex (glucosamine chondroitin) - joints... :)

Like I said before - we need to have a family reunion at a health spa and get detoxed... :)

Chris said...

Ginseng is super sweet stuff. They have it in those energy drinks.

DebbieLou said...

Flax seed also makes a beautiful addition to the yard. Who knew?